My dad “goes to the store” for about 6 hours a day and comes home with nothing.
(A while ago the dog gets into the garbage bin and my dad comes home to find me picking up the scattered trash) “You can’t just have garbage laying around on the floor! What if there were babies crawling around our house! They’d get sick and die!”
He’s brought up our house having multiple anonymous babies in it a few times now.
I don’t have a clue what he does in his spare time.